Santa Cruz, California, October 28th, 2014

Santa Cruz, California, October 28th, 2014

Monday, October 28, 2013

Of all the nerve!!

My back and hip joints are messing with me again. They are angry.

I sound like bad Hemingway writing. "The spine was angry that day..."

WHY is my back sore? I mean, why is my back almost always sore???

In June of 1998, we were in Toronto, to celebrate my in-law's 50th Wedding Anniversary. My back and legs were HURTING. The poor sciatic nerve on my right side was in trouble. Ow. Ow. Ow. So we found a chiropractor close by to where we were staying and went to him. The somewhat flamingly New Age-y twit told me if I felt a sneeze coming, to curl forward.

I was clueless, so I believed him.


That Saturday, we joined hundreds of friends and family in downtown Toronto and had a blast celebrating John and Stella's 50 years together. I was in an excruciating amount of pain. I was swallowing Advil and Tylenol and anything else I could get my hands on. I'd find a couch and lie down and weep. 

Late that night, actually, at 12:30am Sunday morning, I discovered I was pregnant. Joy mixed with worry because, holy cow, I had been taking some seriously strong pain killers!!!

Everyone was very happy, but I was still in a whack of pain. Monday morning, we drove a few hours to the little town where we lived before moving to New Brunswick. A party awaited us, but I hid in the kitchen, catching up with my friends as we put the finishing touches on dinner.

Then I felt a sneeze coming. So I curled forward. And what happened next can only be described as feeling like someone had shot me, at point blank range. And I swear on a stack of Laura Frantz and Lori Benton books that I have NEVER EVER been in that kind of pain. I've had 4 babies. I know pain.

Long story short, we found out after I had the baby, that the soft little padding between L2 and L3 blew open. The intervertebral disc was now emptied of most of the fluid and I was laying in a heap on my friend's living room floor. I cannot begin to explain how bad it hurt. But I can tell you, I couldn't fully feel both my legs. As in, I couldn't walk. I couldn't stand up on my own. I lost 10 pounds in 10 days because it hurt to eat, drink and go to the washroom.
I cried for weeks.

We made it home, Lord knows how I survived that drive, and I called my doctor and began physiotherapy. No one knew the damage because I was pregnant, hence no x-rays. 
In 8 months of pregnancy, I had 9 pain free days.
Think about a knife in your back, for 8 months.
Yes, 8. My son was 4 weeks early.

Now think about delivering a 6 pound baby with the knife in your back.

That was 16 years ago. That baby? Perfectly fine. Not a single health problem.  

But, my back will never heal. Surgery is a last resort and even then, the surgeon said that the risk of scar tissue forming over the initial injury is too high, unless I was in pain, 24/7.

So, there you go. 

And yes, he was worth every moment of pain.


  1. And he has a lovely piece of artwork to celebrate his arrival!
    Are you standing? How many times have you stood up today??? Hmmmmm?????

    1. YES!!! And he still has it in his room.

      I've been moving around, carefully, resting, using heart...

  2. Wow, and I thought I had a difficult pregnancy! Bless you, praying you feel better soon.

    1. Thanks!! Yup, it was not easy. But hey, he's taller than me now!!